COMING OF AGE

Oh Fudge, A Christmas Story

Many family Christmas traditions involve watching a timeless movie such as It’s a Wonderful Life, National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation or A Christmas Story that loops endlessly during the holiday.  An episode of A Christmas Story triggered a long-ago memory of what I now recognize as one of those coming of age moments in life.  If you think about it, I bet just about everyone can look in the rear view mirror and remember a milestone time when life suddenly became more serious, as you unconsciously began the slow transition from unbridled youth to responsible adulthood.

I don’t particularly agree with a definition for coming of age that specifies an age and/or ceremony that automatically qualifies someone as an adult.  Some examples are a confirmation or bar mitzvah ceremony or reaching the age to enter the military or vote.  I agree that it’s a time when most teenagers mature emotionally.   Coming of age stories tend to focus on internal monologue over action and are often set in the past.  

The Christmas Story scene I was referencing involves the family outing to buy a real tree for the home.  For those of us that can go back that far, artificial Christmas trees weren’t an option and car tires were pretty fragile compared to the tires we ride on today.  It was snowing outside on the drive home when a rear tire lost air pressure forcing Ralphie’s father to pull over and begin changing it out.  Ralphie’s mother suggested that he was old enough to assist his father and was given the assignment to hold the lug nuts in the hub caps we no longer use.  Of course, he dropped them in the snow, but being asked to help his father marked the beginning of Ralphie’s coming of age.

I was around Ralphie’s age one very cold, windy and snowy night close to Christmas when my father exited the house to leave for his job as an engineer on the Santa Fe Railroad.  I had watched my father leave for work many times at all hours of the day, given that the railroad is a 24/7 operation.  For some reason on this night I went to the back door and peered through the frosted window to see that he had not left.  A frigid north wind swirled the heavy snow around our car in the driveway.  I asked my mother why my father would want to go to work on such a terrible night and she softly answered that he had to support our family so that we had a warm house and food on the table.  Up until that moment, I had always taken those things for granted.  She suggested that I bundle up and go outside to see if I could be helpful.  The wind chill went right through my body as I trudged through the gathering snow and asked if I could help my father put on the tire chains he was installing.  He handed me the jack handle he was using to elevate the rear tires.  At least we weren’t changing a tire so I could lose the lug nuts! 

My father then drove off to work into the intense winter storm and I walked back into the warmth of our modest home while coming of age.  My parents’ dream for me was to go to college and I ultimately received a Master’s Degree in Industrial Engineering and a professional career.  I’m certain that even though my work life had many challenges, they never compared to that winter’s night and the memory always sustained me through my own life storms to a peaceful silent night.